"Through thick and thin, I'm here for you no matter what."
Imagine your sister telling you, for the first time, about her budding romantic relationship with her best female friend. Or imagine that you just found your brother's gay porn folder on the computer. How do you react? Now imagine that you grew up in a culture where lesbian and gay sexual orientation is hardly discussed and barely visible in mainstream society. What happens to your relationship with your lesbian or gay sibling within this cultural context?
LGBT individuals of color experience unique stressors associated with the simultaneous discrimination related to both their race and ethnicity and their sexual minority status (Balsam, Molina, Beadnell, Simoni, & Walters, 2011). Han (2007), for example, found that gay Asian American men have difficulty coming out due to the "homophobia found in racial communities and the racism found in gay communities" (p. 65).
Heterosexual siblings of lesbian and gay individuals play a critical role in navigating the coming out process. Specifically, children born in the United States to immigrant parents learn both American and Asian cultures, thereby, putting them in a unique position in balancing both value systems.
To gain insight into the heterosexual siblings' perspective, Huang, Chen, and Ponterotto (2016) (PDF, 102KB) conducted a qualitative study, recently published in the Asian American Journal of Psychology, with second-generation Chinese and Taiwanese Americans. Most participants recalled how their bicultural identity as Chinese American or Taiwanese American helped them become more open to their lesbian or gay sibling's sexual orientation.
Results showed that all participants were ultimately supportive of their gay sibling. All participants reported undergoing personal changes and struggles that were ultimately positive, including: becoming more open-minded, engaging in active self-reflection and learning, and experiencing an increase in empathy. Participants became more involved in LGBT issues and other political issues involving marginalized, minority populations. Sibling relationships usually became closer as a result of discovering a gay sibling's sexual orientation, and participants would stand up for their lesbian or gay sibling in and outside of the family. The participants who held strong Christian beliefs struggled with their religious values and reevaluated how they could love and accept their gay sibling while maintaining their faith.
Mental health professionals who work with heterosexual siblings should strive to contextualize the individual's behaviors in a larger social and familial context. The client's family, social, and political context plays a role in her or his conflicting reactions with their gay sibling's lesbian or gay sexual orientation. Should clients struggle with different aspects of their context, they should be given the room to explore them.
Through the use of qualitative research methodology, researchers have the unique opportunity of becoming transformed by participants' stories. The principal investigator of this study, Dr. Jill Huang, was pleasantly surprised by the love participants had for their lesbian and gay siblings. Love prevailed over the seeming incompatibility of the Chinese culture and lesbian and gay sexual orientation and often changed the participants personally to develop a deeper awareness and appreciation for difference. Dr. Huang feels optimistic that with each new generation, love will continue to triumph.
Citation:
- Huang, J., Chen, E. C., & Ponterotto, J. G. (2016). Heterosexual Chinese Americans' experiences of their lesbian and gay sibling's coming out. Asian American Journal of Psychology, 7(3), 147–158. http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/aap0000051
Note: This article is in the Social Psychology & Social Processes topic area. View more articles in the Social Psychology & Social Processes topic area.