Mary Langford, 60, acted in the television shows "Murder One" and "Ally McBeal," served as a personal assistant to bestselling novelist Sidney Sheldon and film critic Leonard Maltin, performed stand-up comedy and worked at a celebrity-booking agency.
She also has schizoaffective disorder, a condition she developed at age 53 after a period of intense personal stress. Marked by hallucinations and delusions, disorganized thinking, depression and mania, her symptoms came on so swiftly that her family immediately had her hospitalized. From there, she lived in a halfway house, and when 11 rounds of electroshock therapy failed to relieve her symptoms, she drove her car off a cliff, breaking her back. That incident set her on the road to recovery.
Now, Langford is back to a productive life, thanks to medication, therapy, and support from family and friends. But she acknowledges she will probably never be completely symptom-free. "I still struggle with suicidal ideation, thinking there is no way out," she says. "That is what I'm working really hard to combat."
Langford is one of 60 people with schizophrenia or schizo-affective disorder who are telling their stories as part of the Schizophrenia Oral History Projectopens in new window, headed by psychologist Tracy McDonough, PhD, an associate professor at Mount St. Joseph University in Cincinnati, and psychologist Lynda Crane, PhD, a Mount St. Joseph professor emerita who started the project in 2011, 15 years after her son with schizophrenia died by suicide. While schizophrenia and schizoaffective disorder both include psychotic and mood symptoms, the psychotic symptoms in schizophrenia tend to be persistent, while in schizoaffective disorder they are more episodic. Mood disturbances are also more frequent in people with schizoaffective disorder.
The project brings the stories of these people to life and in the process debunks common myths—for example that people with schizophrenia tend to be violent, are always disconnected from reality or do not understand what people are saying about them. It's the only archive of its kind in the country—a collection of life-history narratives instead of more traditional illness narratives, the team explains.
"It's important for us to help others understand that these are real people this is happening to, and their hopes and dreams are being dashed," says Crane. "Their potential is extraordinarily limited from what they thought their life was going to be." Sharing their stories, the team hopes, will help people with the condition and the public appreciate their resilience in the face of extraordinary challenges.
What should people know about you?
To gather the stories, the team interviews and audiotapes people who have contacted them to volunteer, often on the recommendation of a provider or agency.
The interviewers start with a simple request: "Tell us about you and your life." The "narrators" talk about anything and everything—not only about how they cope with frightening symptoms, but also about their relationships, pets, jobs and hobbies.
Alice Fischer, whose colorful artwork appears on the project's website, says she wants people to know she's not dangerous—that she's a good, kind person who happens to have a problem.
Paul, whose symptoms keep him from working, tends an organic garden and thinks deeply about ethical issues.
Shirley Austin, who has schizophrenia and survived childhood sexual abuse, encourages others to be strong and not to give up.
The team shares these audio recordings and accompanying slideshows featuring photos of the narrators and their lives with audiences that have included mental health professionals and advocates, academics, undergraduate and graduate students, medical residents and community members. (Narrators do not appear in person due to the stress of presenting.) A key aspect is building a conversation between narrators and audiences: Audience members fill out feedback forms, and the team compiles their responses and returns them to individual narrators.
"People will say things like, ‘You're so courageous and inspiring,' or ‘These people are saner than the people I work with,'" says McDonough.
In turn, narrators are moved by the feedback: Austin, for example, teared up as she told McDonough, "I feel like I matter for the first time." The team continues the process by sharing narrator feedback with the next audience, reaching about 70 different groups so far.
"Once audience members connect with Paul through his gardening or with Austin through a shared love of pets, these narrators are no longer seen as the 'other,' but as someone they can relate to," McDonough says.
The team has been moved by many aspects of the project, but one in particular is learning how much the narrators hope their participation will help others, Crane adds.
"The need to have a purpose is as important for people who have schizophrenia as it is for anybody else," she says.
To see and hear more stories from the Schizophrenia Oral History Project, visit www.schizophreniaoralhistories.comopens in new window. For more information or to get involved, email Dr. Lynda Crane at cranel98@gmail.com, or Dr. Tracy McDonough at tracy@schizophreniaoralhistories.com.
