Although most caregivers are age 45 to 64, Joanna,* 34, became the primary caregiver for her grandparents when she started graduate school in Milwaukee in the fall.
Joanna's mother had been their primary caregiver, but her mother's job transferred her across the country. The oldest of 11 grandchildren, Joanna felt she was the most logical candidate to take on the responsibility. Her grandfather has dementia and her grandmother is at high risk of a stroke and has an essential tremor—a nervous system disorder that causes her head to shake.
Joanna's grandparents were no longer capable of living independently, so the trio moved from Illinois to Wisconsin when she started graduate school. She makes the meals, drives them to appointments, picks up prescriptions and maintains the house—and occasionally stays in the emergency room when her grandmother's heart condition worsens.
"It's hard to juggle graduate school and caregiving," says Joanna, who is studying counseling psychology. "I have to finish my homework at school because when I go home, my caregiving responsibilities begin. I feel like my world is really different than my peers' lives."
Her professors and peers occasionally ask how her grandparents are doing, and cousins have helped with a few projects around the house, like removing a dead tree in the yard. But for the most part, Joanna shoulders the day-to-day responsibilities on her own.
Joanna says she's grateful to be with her grandparents in their final years. "I enjoy playing dominos with them or walking down the street," she says. "I used to think I was organized, but this requires an entirely new level of planning. If I have children someday, maybe I'll be more prepared."
*The source for this story preferred not to use her real name.